Washington D.C. – In an effort to decrease vaccine hesitancy and stop the spread of Covid-19, including the Delta variant, governments worldwide are now implementing plans to require proof of vaccination for access to drinking water.  Access to water for agrarian purposes, cooking, bathing, and other necessary applications are currently under consideration.

The CDC, The World Health Organization, and the World Economic Form have all determined that this is the best course of action after receiving guidance from both Bill Gates and Anthony Fauci.

We recently attended a town hall meeting with Mr. Bill Gates, Dr. Anthony Fauci, and Donald Trump

Mr. Gates said, “Look, we know the vaccines aren’t as effective as we need them to be.  We’re working on that.  Future vaccines will be more effective as we do more research and attain more data.  That said, we need to increase the adoption of vaccines so that we are able to more effectively collect more data as we’ve learned that data from traditional clinical trials is far too limiting understanding that the gene pool is so diverse in today’s global economy.”

With regards to the US economy, the health care, pharmaceutical, and biotech sectors have all seen record investment, growth, and profits in both 2020 and 2021 as a result of the pandemic.  There is no intention of slowing this down.  And the citizens of the US have been provided with ample funds at no present cost to them to spur other commercial sectors.

Dr. Fauci added, “Ever since the AIDS epidemic in the 1980s, we’ve been working to effectively create the opportunity that belies us today.  And now the opportunity is here.  We have the opportunity to effectively vaccinate every living human being on the planet and even most captive animals.  Due to the mass adoption of the vaccines, the net effective cost per vaccination is becoming very affordable at scale when costs are spread across the entire US population.  Even if the US continues to freely provide vaccines to every other nation.  Now is the time to follow the science of economics.”

Donald Trump piped in, “The vaccines are effective.  Look at my portfolio.  And we need to focus on effectiveness.  I love effectiveness.  Effectiveness is very important.  Everything we do should be effective.  Effectively. Effection.  And the vaccines effectively raise the opportunity for all of us and my friends.”

In the end, as Americans, we all know that those who are still vaccine-hesitant need to set aside their beliefs, thoughts and fears.  We need to “take care of them”.  We need to make sure they vaccinate so that we can protect them and stop the spread of Covid-19.  Because without proof of vaccination, they will not have access to the water they need.

Mr. Trump added, “And not having access to water would go very badly for them.”

Dr. Fauci quickly put the cherry on top by stating, “And that would effectively increase the likelihood that they will quickly die from Covid-19.”